The Radio Industry is Strange

Earlier I posted, and a few moments ago I deleted, a rant about how I had wanted to listen to the debut of the Dan Bongino Show as a replacement for the Rush Limbaugh Show and I missed it, blaming neglect of the website/app for iHeartRadio.

I had expected it to hear it yesterday on AM 1150 The Patriot KEIB, which was literally formatted around the Rush Limbaugh Show. But when I listened yesterday morning, it was a (repeated, I assume) guest host on the late Rush Limbaugh's show. I couldn't figure out why the website wasn't streaming Dan Bongino, and why the Twitter account for KEIB, an iHeartRadio station, didn't explain what was happening.

Turns out even though Bongino is replacing Limbaugh pretty much using the infrastructure Limbaugh built, in the Los Angeles market, his show is running on AM 790 KABC, a Cumulus station. So yesterday, KABC listeners tuned in and heard Bongino speaking fondly of Rush Limbaugh, who didn't air on KABC. I realize the show is national, but it still seems strange it wouldn't air on 1150.

So now I have to wonder what's going to happen to The Patriot, which airs Hannity in the afternoon. How much longer will they run "Rush Limbaugh"? Is the entire format going to flip soon? Or will they try to fill that slot with a local show? Some other national show? Maybe they'll just give up and run paid infomercials.

UPDATE May 27, 2021: OK, it makes sense now. I fell for some radio marketing hype BS that said Dan Bongino was replacing Rush Limbaugh. That wasn't true, at least not literally. Bongino's show might be replacing the Rush Limbaugh Show in some markets, but he's not taking over Limbaugh's actual show or even his place (as we've seen in the Los Angeles market).

Today, the news broke that Premiere Networks, which is an iHeartMedia subsidiary, announced Clay Travis and Buck Sexton will be the actual replacements of Rush Limbaugh.

There may be some markets which carried Limbaugh which are opting to go with Bongino instead of Travis and Sexton, but Travis and Sexton are the actual heirs to the Rush Limbaugh Show.

If You Get Emails When This Blog Is Updated...

Blogger says they're going to stop emailing you for new posts. So, bookmark this blog and make a point of checking it at least once per week. Make it a habit!!!

A Comment Worth Reading

I hate it when I get a great comment, especially one that obviously took some time to write, and one "profanity" is included. I'm trying to keep profanity off of this blog. If there wasn't much to a comment with profanity, I simply don't publish it. When the comment actually had worthwhile stuff to read, I might do what I'm doing with this comment: make a new post out of it.

"Unknown" left a comment on an entry about one of those articles that tried to get men to sacrifice themselves.

I can’t tell you how much guilt I’ve been shouldering from people on why I am single. I am single at 34 while many of my friends are married. Parents aside I understand they want grandchildren and so do I but NOT now maybe when I’m 45. But this whole shaming from my friends wives to co-workers to relatives to just about any person in a relationship is so ridiculous.

It should be considered sexual harassment when done by coworkers. Seriously. If we're going to have sexual harassment laws and policies, people should get busted for that. It creates just as much of a hostile work environment as an unwanted request for a date.

June Is Coming

Sorry, I'm late getting this message out this year, with the lockdowns and all. But some places are opening up, so this message is once again relevant.

Wedding season, gentlemen. Maybe you’re scheduled to be the groom.

Maybe a man you care about is scheduled to be a groom.

Maybe a woman you’re "seeing" or "with" is expecting you to be her date for a wedding or weddings.

Obviously, the first situation is the most dire.

Woman Is Surprised by Modern Dating

Let's check in on Dear Abby and see what's happening there.

NOT CONNECTING IN MISSOURI wrote:

I am a 48-year-old woman, divorced for 10 years.

Let's see... Missouri... middle aged... yeah, not going to be able to get a very high bid.

During that time, I have been in two serious relationships.

I'm wondering what that means? Most likely that she had tha feelz for them.

I'm no prude, but it seems like everyone I date, and who my friends and I talk to, and articles I see are all about sex, having sex, rushing to sex.

Yep. Because sex is fun.

It's like there's no emphasis on actually getting to know a person anymore.

Don't you get to know someone better when you have sex with them?

Let's translate this into English: "I want a man to spend more money on me before I'll have sex with him."

If she TRULY wanted to get to know a guy more, they'd write back and forth and talk on the phone or video chat. She can ask all the questions she wants that way to get to know him better. It doesn't need to be over a dinner at a restaurant.

A Stupid Statment About Adult Media

"Porn is abuse of women."

While there is adult media in which the characters (and, let's assume also in which the performers) are abused, when someone makes a statement like the one above, they lose credibility. I see "serious" accounts on Twitter making statements like this.

One way to test statements like this is to consider that there is porn that features no women whatsoever. How could it be abuse of women if two or more guys make a video? Or one guy?

Also, consider this:

A woman asks her boyfriend (or, if you prefer, husband) to appear in a video with her. They get stark naked, and at her urging, he performs cunnilingus on her. They both enjoy it. She uploads the video to charge money from people who access it.

Either,,,

1) This is abuse.
2) This isn't porn.
3) Not all porn is abuse.

Which is it?

If someone is still going to argue that this is abuse, they have to maintain that her reception of cunnilingus at her own urging is somehow abusing her. Or that her doing so on-camera, per her own desire, is abuse.

Does anyone want to argue that nude people doing cunnilingus on video isn't porn?

Any reasonable person is going see that not all porn is abuse. Calling it abuse, though, probably seems more compelling than saying "muh religion" or "It bothers me that men can get erotic stimulation from women, especially without paying large sums of money and trading freedom to do so."

It's the same thing when someone uses the word "violence" in their argument instead of "abuse".

Like it or not, there are men and women who choose to bare their bodies for cameras, and choose to engage in sexual activity for cameras. Trying to force people to stop doing this or stop watching it is futile. People can make, sell, and distribute porn by themselves using their own handheld device. Anyone who claims they can abolish porn is playing on the gullible, probably for money or votes.

Stop Using Stupid Arguments Against Adult Media

It Is Important for Husbands to Speak Up Honestly

Married men are happier* than unmarried men.

That's what we hear all of the time.

Now, it may technically be true. If you group ALL married men and ALL unmarried men and compare them, the married men may report being happier than the unmarried men.

This doesn't mean that signing a legal contract with the state is what has made a man happy. There are many other possible explanations.

First, though, notice that when you group ALL unmarried men together, you are grouping in divorced men, widowed men, men who want to get married but haven't been able to find/win over the "right" woman (likely because they are financially struggling or ill or have some other condition that might make them unhappy), and generally unhappy men, who are less likely to attract and keep a wife. We need studies that compare intentionally unmarried men to married men. My guess is that intentionally unmarried men would report being as happy or even happier than married men. Also, notice that these are percentages about a population. You'll find individuals who are unmarried but happier than the average husband, and married men who are very unhappy in comparison to the average bachelor. Is there any way to guarantee you'll be in the higher levels of happiness? Not that I know of, but when a man is unmarried he has far more control over his own situation.

Would You Encourage Your Child to Gamble?

It's a sad, brutal fact of life that the odds are literally against the average/random person having a lasting, happy marriage. Put another way, most marriages are not successful, if your definition of success is that the marriages last until death and are generally happy ones.

Let's consider the specific facts:

1) 33-40% of first marriages end in divorce. Subsequent marriages have a much higher divorce rate.

2) Of the marriages that don't legally divorce, easily at least 20% (and probably much higher) fall under one of the following scenarios:
  a) legal separation
  b) physical separation (some people stay legally married for decades after they've split, even if they haven't seen each other in years)
  c) one spouse murders the other, whether or not they then kill themselves (other than the person who claims to have found the body, the default suspect in the murder of a married person is their spouse... what does that tell you???)
 d) the marriage would have ended in divorce, but before that could happen one or both spouses died (whether from suicide, overdose, illness, accident, disaster, violent crime, etc.)
 e) the spouses are miserable, but don't divorce for whatever reason (chicken, habit, masochism), and this might or might involve affairs and/or abuse

So, 33 (which is a lowball) and 20 (which is also lowball) add up to 53% of marriages being "failed" marriages. Add in...

3) A small (but I'm sure rapidly growing) percentage of people never marry.

Those facts all add up to mean that we can literally say most marriages are not lasting, happy marriages and most people will not get married and stay happily married for life.

A Report From the Front

Guys, if you're going to be foolish enough to marry (or even just to let a woman live with you), have a professional background check or private investigation into her. It will be worth it. Check out this comment left after one of my previous entries here.

I was dumb enough to marry a narcissistic, evil, moody, gold digging snake. I was lonely and she put on the fake charm. I did not realize how good I had it being single. I had it all.

That is very, very important. Don't fall for peer of family pressure. Don't fall for the Hollywood Hallmark or Focus on the Family or Dennis Prager marriage-selling pitches. There's nothing wrong with being free (unmarried), and for most men, you're better off.

She became meaner, fatter and more abusive by the day.

Believe it or not, especially in religious circles, there are people who read that and say those things are his fault. He should have been able to lead her in a way, or love her in a way, that she wouldn't have done those things. Or that he's some sort of misogynist for having those complaints. Don't fall for that.

After I filed, I had her investigated and found out, the beast had a criminal record and two previous divorces on her record. She expected to walk away with my house and my kids. I hired the best father’s rights attorney, custody experts and employment experts as she claimed she did not work and I was not an involved father. In the end, I won and kept not only my kids but my home, although it took over two years and over six figures to expose the lying old hag. The truth always comes out eventually. So glad the courts did see that she was the problem. Never again!

So sorry you went through all of that, Anonymous! Thanks for the warning. Please comment at any time.

Again, if you're going to be foolish enough to marry (or live with, or impregnate) a woman, there needs to be FULL DISCLOSURE of anything that could possibly be relevant. If there are red flags, including that she held anything back from you, DO NOT STAY!

Among other things, you need to know:

All of her prior residences and/or properties she's owned
Any prior marriages

Any children she's had, including any eggs or embryos she donated

Her entire medical history, including mental health and dental and her birth certificate

Any significant debts she has or has had

Her credit score and history

Her education record

Her driving record

Her arrest/criminal record
Significant assets she has

Judgments against her

Employment history

It's not romantic, but you know what else isn't romantics? Finding out after you've signed a state contract with her, or worse, had a child with her, things you should have known before.

Can You Give Just One Good Reason For a Man to Marry?

Remider: I've added a page making this challenge.

Comments are accepted on that page, so there's no need to make them here.

He's Doing It Right

Many of the people commenting on this letter to Dear Abby from ALMOST DONE IN NEW YORK think the letter writer is seeing a married man, but it reads to me like he's a pretty good Leykis 101 student or a Free Man.

I have been on and off with a man for two years.

He's been getting sex when he wants it with her for two years. But the relationship isn't "going" anywhere.

In all this time, he has never spent a holiday or Valentine's Day with me, or introduced me to his family or friends.

Perfect! He's not wasting money and effort, nor giving her real insight into his life, nor giving her the impression that he's going to marry her.

He told me to stay in the bathroom at his office when his friends showed up unexpectedly. When I objected, he said, "It's only for 20 minutes." I was horrified.

If that really was his office, it's the one mistake I've detected in this letter. But either way, keeping her from his associated and deflating her are Leykis 101 moves.

He accuses me of picking fights and says I will never be happy with anyone when I try to talk with him about it.

Yup. Keeping her from being complacent or for thinking she can do better than him.

Valentine's Day Aftermath

Are you an unmarried guy who just spent a lot of money and effort on Valentine's Day, only to get what you used to get all of the time? Or did you get less than that?

Did you even propose marriage and give her a ring?

If you're not married, and you just made a big deal about Valentine's Day, and especially if you proposed marriage, you need to step back and think about what you've done and you are doing. Are you regretful? Are you doubting? Are you asking yourself "Why did I do that?" If not, you probably should be.

Most men shouldn't be in exclusive relationships, and certainly not marriage!

Most unmarried men, if they play their cards right, can get everything they want without spending a lot of money and energy on Valentine's Day, birthdays, holidays, or anniversaries.

If there is a woman who is planning to marry you this June, or any other time this year, you probably need to put the brakes on the relationship, especially if there are any red flags. If you're shacking up and/or if she has kids, plan your escape!

You don't need to be married. And there's a good chance that, deep down, you don't really want to be.

So, get out. And learn to be scarce so that you won't get trapped into wasting money, effort, and time on things like Valentine's Day or meeting a woman's family or friends for holidays.

Be a Free Man.

Marriage Week

Every year, marriage sellers take this week for National Marriage Week or whatever, to try to fool men into getting married. 

As a married man who understands statistics and has closely observed the overall situation of marriage in America and other English-speaking countries, I beg you... I literally BEG YOU... DO NOT MARRY if you're a man. You may think you're the exception, but odds are remote that you are.

Please read through this tag to see why you shouldn't marry.

February 14 Will Be Here Soon, Guys!

Guys, if you're not married, you shouldn't be with a woman right now you've been seeing for more than a couple of months.

You're supposed to be scarce to such a woman until at least February 15 (or, until her the day after her birthday, or a day she considers an anniversary with you, if one or both occur soon after).

If you have a girlfriend right now, how were the holidays? How much time, money, and effort did you spend? Did you have to endure her family? Or bring her around your family? What a mess.

If you've been a free man through the holidays, keep up the good work. But if you've got a woman who thinks of you as her boyfriend or fiancé, you need to hit the eject button or get very scarce to her before we get too close to Valentine's Day.

Why?

1) So she doesn't get the idea that this is heading for a marital or live-in or even an exclusive situation;
and

2) To avoid spending money on gifts for her, an overpriced and crowded dinner, hotel rooms, or anything else she might expect.

Be scarce. Be busy, Be "working". Don't answer her calls, texts, etc. or only respond "late" to every third or fourth one, saying you're busy. (She shouldn't know where you really live, or what you're actual phone's number is - use Google Voice or something similar.)

This year, with COVID-19, you have more of an excuse to be scarce than ever before!

If she won't see you again come February 15 (or whichever day it ends up being), so be it. There are many other women, if you still want to see any.

During that time, it's fine to see women who aren't of the "commitment" or "exclusive" thinking, at least when it comes to you. or new women, and you can see a new woman who is alone and desperate on February 14, as long as you're picking her up out and about, on the fly.

Or, use that time to hang out with friends, family, catch up on hobbies, do those chores you've been putting off, etc.

You DO NOT want to be with a woman who is thinking that because you've been seeing her for a while, and you're with her on February 14, that you're going to be exclusive with her, or living with her, or heading towards marriage. You DO NOT want to have to buy her gifts, or pay her way to some party or event or overpriced dinner or hotel room. Whatever you do, do NOT get married!!! (Some people have a simple ceremony on February 14, like at a county office.)

Read more:

What Do I Mean By "Free Men"?

Stop! Don't Propose! Don't Marry!

You Don't Need A Girlfriend

Red Flags

It's One of Those Seasons

It's one of those times in which my my marriage is especially difficult. I'll probably fill you in later. I have so much content here. Take a look around. There's probably some great stuff you haven't read before.

Don't Be This Guy

This was painful to read. Today's Dear Abby has a letter from "TOO MUCH, TOO SOON":

My 25-year-old son has been dating a girl for two or three months. She seems very nice.

Your son doesn't really know her. Neither do you.

She has two children and is pregnant with her third child. She's due in three months. The child is not my son's.

What are the odds there are three different "fathers"?

I was told by some friends of my son that he's planning to sign the birth certificate as the father. He understands the implications.

No, he really doesn't. He's signing up for what could be 26 years of supporting some other guy's kid, and possibly almost as much and as long for the other kids, too. 

How do I convince him that, although he feels like he and this girl will be together for the long haul, this is a poor decision to make, especially because of the short length of time they have been dating?

So many questions.

Facebook is a Front Row Seat to a Train Wreck

[Bumped up.] Human memory is one thing.


Being able to have written/video/photographic evidence is another.

Yesterday, I noticed a couple of high school classmates of mine indicating on Facebook that they are each going through divorces. I thought back to previous updates from them and how I'd like to juxtapose them with their current updates. There's gotta be a blog or website that does this already, right? Feel free to leave the URL in the comments (always feel free to comment). And yes, I'm well aware the same could be said for this blog, in terms of comparing old entries to current entries.

Facebook can be a great chronicler to show men that present-day legal-social marriage is, in a majority* of cases, a disaster.


Thanks to Facebook and the tendency for some people to overshare, we can pull the "highlights" into a condensed timeline that depicts:


1) The lovey-dovey joint selfies. Aren't they such a cute couple?!?
2) The Very Important Engagement Photos
3) The Even More Important Wedding Date Announcement - be sure to save the date!!!
4) HER Big Day! Awwww, they're so happy!!! It's amazing what spending tens of thousands of dollars can look like.
5) The Honeymoon Period - we'll see memes posted about the profound nature of marriage and how he's her soul mate.
[There may be pregnancy test, ultrasound, and baby photos scattered throughout, but ideally they'd be here.]
6) The inevitable clear, explicit tweets disrespecting and badmouthing her husband --OR-- the cryptic vague use of memes that indicate all is not well.
7) She changes her name back and starts a seemingly endless series of jabs at her (now ex, or soon to be ex) husband, the man she couldn't wait to marry. She may also post pleas for help moving, a place to stay, etc., and may also share photos of her new boyfriend, who is either a bad-boy or is obviously wealthier than her husband.


Facebook is also handy to document that many women butch up and blimp up after getting him to sign that legal contract. Even my wife pointed out how, when a friend of mine married, it wasn't even 24 hours later before his new bride chopped off her hair. There will be fewer pictures that include her that she'll post, or fewer that include a good view of her whole body. She might post cartoons and memes about how hard it is for a married woman to avoid letting herself go.


*Guys, here are the facts:

The divorce rate for first marriages, which is much lower than second/third/etc. marriages, is 40%. Much more than 10% of the marriages that last until at least one of them dies are miserable marriages most, or a significant amount of the time. That means the odds are that getting married will mean either getting divorced or being miserable. Yes, there ARE people who beat those odds, but there's no way to guarantee you'll be one of them.

Very few of today's women are prepared and willing to be a good wife to a man who is looking for someone to take care of the home and raise children. Dr. Laura tells women to inform their husbands that, despite whatever agreements they had, they will be staying home to raise the children; that they will budget to do with less income and since they won't have the stress of working outside the home, they will have the time and energy to be attentive mothers who take the children for nice outings, prepare homemade meals, and have lots of great sex with their husbands. Now, don't get me wrong... I think children should be raised by a loving parent instead of hired help and I agree this is how things should be, but how many women actually end up behaving that way? The husband gets trashed because they can't buy things or take as nice vacations living on his income alone; the kid gets stuck in a corner with a TV and/or a tablet; the meals either don't get prepared ("You have two hands, do it yourself!") or are microwave fare; the sex isn't going to be often enough or be all that good, because she doesn't want it as much as he does and she no longer has an incentive to pretend to be as into it as he is. Again, there ARE exceptions. If you're a woman who truly does raise your own kids and you take care of the man who is providing you with a roof over your head and paying your bills, then you're awesome. You're also a very rare species.

December Is Here and That Requires Evasive Maneuvers

Unmarried men (whether you are single, in relationship, or engaged), how is your holiday game plan coming along?

Guys, December is here, and that means holidays, like Christmas, Hanukkah [now past], and the New Year. Those can be threats to free men. (If you're an American who celebrated Thanksgiving in November, you should have already taken steps to ensure your freedom won't be jeopardized, but if you haven't, you really need to act sooner rather than later.)

Now is the time, guys. It is time to become extremely scarce to any woman who considers you her fiancé or expects your relationship to head that way. If you're seeing a woman regularly, it is time to disrupt that. Don't end up spending a lot of money! Don't give her (or her family!) the impression that you're eager to marry. That is what she/they will think if you join her at events with her friends and family. You shouldn't even know any of her friends or family. You should only be seeing her when the Sun isn't visible, preferably at her place.

In taking evasive maneuvers, you're going to avoid seeing her until at least February 15. 

And whatever you do, if you haven't already, DO NOT PROPOSE!!! Don't be hoodwinked by those terrible jewelry ads!!!

There is a GREAT excuse this year to avoid her friends and family, and to keep her away from yours, and to be scarce! You "want to be responsible and need to avoid potentially spreading COVID-19."

In reality, you DO NOT want a woman seeing you as part of her family. You don't want her family members or friends or yours asking "When are you going to get married?" or "When are you going to get engaged?" Going to family gatherings with her is counterproductive since you do not want to get married. (You really, really don't.)

Don't be driving her places. Don't be getting her airline tickets or hotel rooms. I don 't care if you have points. Save those points for you!

If there is a woman who thinks of herself as your fiancée or the girlfriend, you need to become scarce NOW, and not resurface for her until February 15 at the earliest. If she breaks up with you, so be it. You're better off. If she has your ring and you never get it back (even though she's supposed to return it), consider it the price of freedom and learn the lesson that you should never ever buy jewelry for a woman who isn't your family member.

Need companionship from a woman? Now is the time to make new, casual connections. Even better, do the things you need and want to do so that when the pandemic is behind us, you'll be in an even better position.

Don't be the boyfriend or fiancé who is buying her gifts in December, kissing her at midnight at the turn of the year, spending all sorts of money and time on her to plan for February 14. Avoid all of that!!!

American Men, We Are Almost to Thanksgiving

Unmarried men (whether you are single, in relationship, or engaged), how is your holiday game plan coming along?

Thanksgiving Day is next week! It's the 26th!

You DO NOT want to go along with a woman to be with her friends or family, and you don't want her tagging along if you're going to be with yours. 

There is a GREAT excuse this year! You "want to be responsible and need to avoid potentially spreading COVID-19."

In reality, you DO NOT want a woman seeing you as part of her family. You don't want her family members or friends or yours asking "When are you going to get married?" or "When are you going to get engaged?" Going to family gatherings with her is counterproductive since you do not want to get married. (You really, really don't.) If you spend Thanksgiving with her, she's going to expect you to be getting her some expensive gifts in December, maybe even a diamond ring. AVOID THAT!

Don't be driving her places. Don't be getting her airline tickets or hotel rooms. I don 't care if you have points. Save those points for you!

If there is a woman who thinks of herself as your fiancée or the girlfriend, you need to become scarce NOW, and not resurface for her until February 15 at the earliest. If she breaks up with you, so be it. You're better off. If she has your ring and you never get it back (even though she's supposed to return it), consider it the price of freedom and learn the lesson that you should never ever buy jewelry for a woman who isn't your family member.

Need companionship from a woman? Now is the time to make new, casual connections. Even better, do the things you need and want to do so that when the pandemic is behind us, you'll be in an even better position.

Don't be the boyfriend or fiancé who is there at Thanksgiving, who is buying her gifts in December, kissing her at midnight at the turn of the year, spending all sorts of money and time on her to plan for February 14. Avoid all of that!!!

Especially Noteworthy Comments

I'm calling attention to three recent comments. The first agrees with me, but I didn't publish it in-place because it has "profanities" that I want to keep off of the blog. Yeah, I know it seems silly to a lot of people, but I'm convinced that more people will find the blog if I keep profanities off it. There are two disagreeing comments I will also include before even though I did publish them in their original place.

The first one was anonymous, left after this entry about how getting married was the biggest mistake in my life. 

F---in A, wish I thought to google this s--- before I lost my mind. You are 100% correct.

Before marriage = a complete regard for the fact that this can end anytime, therefore, regular upkeep and involvement with the day to day bulls--- while tending each others needs.

After marriage = a staggering shift in staying sexually satisfied. Can't be bothered to help upkeep the house or be bothered by anything other than what is directly an interest to her.

I become a walking ATM and start to be told how crappy of a husband I am. Even though I literally put a roof over our heads, take care of all the finances and house work. After Kids = sex is non-existent but, I better jump when she says how high because of the kid. Constantly reminded of what a dead beat dad I am, while finishing my college degree and upkeeping everything else in the mean time.

Moral of the story, marriage is a way for woman to s--- on men and not contribute jack to the relationship. Is she a good mom? Yes, she is an outstanding mom and I will never deny that. But I have been a far better husband than she has ever been a wife.

And now I don't want to divorce because I came from a single parent household and do not want do not want my daughter to grow up without a father like I did. Worse mistake of my life by far. Not saying it couldn't work, but I'd be 100% willing to bet that even if we had a kid, I would be happier had I never proposed. In my experience, most men just want the love of a good woman, and most women are willing to manipulate men to get whatever they want, and then shit on them as soon as they are no longer happy with him.

So sorry, man. 

DO NOT MARRY, GUYS!!!