Sunday, September 05, 2010

Your Baby Daddy's Momma

Dear Margo thinks things stop being sins as time passes. "Not Getting Through" wrote into Dear Margo:

I am currently engaged to a man I love everything about (well, most everything). However, his mother, who I refer to as "monster-in-law," tries to control everything.
She can only do that if he lets her. This is going to be reality for the rest of his life, unless he changes it.

My fiance and I have a baby together, and his mother stepped in, even before the baby was born, to tell me what I had to do.
Maybe she assumed if you were foolish enough to get knocked up out of wedlock and keep the baby instead of adopting out or getting married immediately, you needed the help. Are you really engaged, or does it just sound better to say you are because you have a kid with him?

For instance, she told me I was not to potty-train my child until she was 3 because she would not be ready until then.
So what? You're going to get all sorts of advice from lots of people.

She even resorted to calling our daughter a "mistake," saying she was born out of sin because we were not married.
Unless you planned to get pregnant out of wedlock, then yes, the pregnancy was a mistake, or rather the actions that caused it were a mistake.

We were both hurt by this.
The truth hurts. You know what hurts more? Children not having married parents.

You chose to raise a baby with and shack up with this guy, and you get his relationship with his mother as part of the package. Deal with it.

Margo responded:

For one thing, the potty-training age she has set is late, by some people’s lights, and the sin thing is way off the mark.
Now this is hilarious for Margo to write, since sin is "missing the mark". Yes, sex with someone who isn't your spouse is a sin according to the Bible. You're free not to believe it, but not to deny the Bible says what it does, because we can all check for ourselves.

A granny who thinks the kid is a bastard is so 18th century.
Circumstances change, but truth doesn't change. The child is not lesser. The parents are being lesser.

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