I rent a house with two roommates (both males) and have always followed a strict rule of not dating roommates or co-workers.Good idea. Well, the rules, anyway. It would be easier if you weren’t living with guys.
One night, I came home after having a few drinks with friends. One of my roommates was up and we started talking. Then he started kissing me. I wasn't thinking clearly, and didn't object when he trotted me off to my room.This is exactly why men guy women drinks.
I do like him, but only as a friend. There are no sparks for me as there are for him.
I don't want this to happen again, but I don't want to hurt him either.Well, being rejected isn't fun, but if he is a typical guy he probably looked at it more as recreation than some sort of pledge of undying love; he won't be devastated. He'll just cross you off of the list until the next time you come home tipsy.
In an ideal world, I'd like to remain friends and roommates, not lovers. Do you have any suggestions?Yes. Simply don't have sex with your roommates. If your drinking causes you to lose control, then stop drinking.
Are you really being honest with yourself, though? You were probably curious or horny or something, and using the alcohol as an excuse. Women who have casual sex do this all of the time.
Dear Abby responded:
Inform your amorous roommate that in the cold sober light of day you regret what happened and don't want to repeat it.Why? It is her actions that matter, not her words (unless she says "no" or some variation thereof).
It won't "hurt" him; it will let him know where things stand, and it's important that he get that message.Only if he starts acting like they are a couple, which I doubt he will. If you tell him it won't happen again, he may consider that a challenge.
Have you had an experience like this?