A Tale of Bait and Switch

Has something like this happened to you? Here's another example of "great as a girlfriend, bad as s wife". "J." wrote in to Dr. Laura:

I am afraid despite any efforts that I might make, my 7 year marriage (2 boys) is coming to an end.

My wife got back in contact with someone from high school and has been having an affair for the last 5 months.

She might realize that she made a mistake in that regard. It happens often in cases like that, though usually the marriage has been in place (and the time since high school) a lot longer.

For the longest time, she has made me feel responsible for our marriage ending and her affair, because I was distant, and working too hard, and I left her alone.

She wanted more attention.

We own our own businesses and it truly was a ton of work, but it provided my wife could stay at home with our kids.

See, there's a rub. If a man is going to support his family, he's going to have to work. In a lot of cases, he's going to need to work a lot. So then the wife is not working outside the home, but she is home without him all the more. It's a cycle.

She has always rejected me when I BEG for sex, and never has she responded when I came home as your book The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands suggests.

Poor guy. Check the DNA of those boys.

Instead she continually complained about having to do all the housework, children stuff, etc. While I was working 60+ hrs a week to allow her to stay home with them and maintain our lifestyle.

You should have offered to switch places.

I also realized that should our marriage end, there are women out there who understand the proper way to care for their husbands.

Yeah, but you should concentrate on raising your boys until they are grown, not finding a new honey.

I also realized my wife was a great girlfriend (affectionate, loving, respectful, thoughtful) but after we got married, she decided the hard work was over.

Ah, bait and switch. Like when a guy romances a woman but stops after she marries him.