Something New in Bed

I wrote recently about becoming sexually compatible with your spouse by seeking to do what brings them pleasure, even if it isn't a turn-on to you. Married Man Sex Life brings up the same concept in this entry, "Return the Favor".

However sometimes your partner likes something and you don't. It's not so much of a dislike of anything, just not a turn on, so the idea of doing it to your partner may never occur to you.

He brings up biting, which he was definitely not into.

Anyway over the last few months I'd noticed Jennifer giving me a couple little nips on the neck during playtime. In general I appreciated the passion, but got nothing from them as a turn on. In fact I think I told her to knock it off during a longer session where I racked up several little nips.

If it was turning her on, go with it.

Last night as an experiment I gave her a little nip... and she did this whole clutch / moan / writhe and sigh routine. So I think she might have liked it. I repeated the experiment a few times and post playtime recap reveals 1-2 little nips good for her, 3+ is a distraction please stop. Which is no problem because biting her isn't much of a turn on for me, but I don't mind doing it to turn her on.

So sometimes what your partner does to you is actually what they want to be done to them and turns them on.

Yes – sometimes.