Friday, December 10, 2010

Sleeping Together, Or Not

One of the things I enjoyed about my past relationsips - in which I was doing things I wasn't supposed to be doing – was actually sleeping with my girlfriends and my not-girlfriends-but-still-doing-bad-things girls. I liked spooning, cuddling, whatever. I liked being right there with her.

My wife and I share a bed, but we don't really sleep together. She usually goes to sleep hours after I do. I'm usually up hours before her. When we were childless newlyweds, that was even more pronounced as we worked completly opposite shifts. But now our careers have changed (she's a SAHM) amd our sleeping hours have a lot of overlap.

There's been almost no spooning or cuddling in bed for our entire marriage. And it isn't for a lack of desire on my part. One of the great things about sleeping together is waking up in the middle of a slumber session or at the end of a slumber session and waking the other person up with sex. However, once either one of us is asleep, this almost never happens. I wouldn't mind. My wife would be annoyed (even without an orgasm, which would keep her awake for hours), and I don't think she gets enough sleep as it is. I certainly don't get enough sleep, either, but I've always been willing to sacrifice sleep for sex.

But even if I just kept it Rated G, my wife says she wouldn't be able to sleep if I was spooning her.

So there we sleep, with a lot of distance between us. As a bonus, the little dog will often sleep between us, sometimes right up against me so that I'll be on the edge of the bed and if I move, the dog will growl loudly to remind me not to crush her.

Really, I need to set up a bed in my man cave and sleep in there. There's no reason I can't stumble into there after lovemaking and fall asleep. It would probably be more restful.

That we would not be sleeping together (as in spooning or cuddling) is one of those things I was unable to determine before we married, as we never shared a bed prior to getting married. It was difficult enough to maintain my wife's virgin status as it was, so actually sharing a bed was out of the question.

Any of you going through anything similar? There has been a lot of news lately about homes getting smaller, but there has also been news about it being more common to build homes with two master bedrooms, as husbands and wives have their own spaces for the actual sleeping.

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