One Way to Warn More Men

If you identify at all with MGTOW or agree with me that most men should stay Free Men (avoiding legal/financial entanglements with women) or at least avoid marriage, one way to get our messages out to more men is to use established platforms, such as online discussions, comments sections, and call-in shows (like talk radio).

Getting a single sentence broadcast can help change lives for the better. If you can red-pill just one man or boy listening, it makes a positive difference. Any show doing an hour or whatever of "open lines" (no set topic) is an opportunity, but especially shows or spaces talking about relationships, dating, family, or marriage.

I wrote an extensive open letter to Dennis Prager, but I'd never call in to his show, for reasons, but you might be able to. Although I'll be using Dennis Prager and Dr. Laura as examples, you can adapt these tactics to any call-in show, preferably one that puts "live" calls on the air. Note that Dennis Prager does live question and answer chats on Facebook and Dr. Laura's show has a Facebook page where she allows comments and discussions on things she posts, which are often about relationships and marriage. You can adapt these messages for any forum, social media, or comments area. 

1. Pick Your "Character"

I'm not asking you to lie, and I'm definitely not asking you to make a prank or crank call or a troll comment. You can be yourself. But you can also lift heavily from this blog, other online sources, people you know, etc. Many callers use an assumed name, and that's perfectly OK to do. It's also fine to claim to be married when you're not, and vice-versa, because you're playing a character based on REAL LIFE. So pick a name and focus on who you'll be on the show. It's OK to play a character to present the scenario as something that has happened or is happening to you, even if it isn't. Of course you can reference your own personal experiences, too. 


A) Never Married. This character is there to get the word out that being a FREE MAN is not only a viable way of life, but preferable to marriage. Messages specific to this character include:

"I'm FREE and I'm loving it."

"It's great to be a Free Man: unmarried and childfree. I do what I want, when I want, how I want. Everything is less expensive for me than my married counterparts, everything is less of a hassle, there's no fighting, no arguing, no nagging, no punishment, no groveling, no apologizing for literally nothing."

"I have GRATTITUDE and HAPPINESS for being a Free Man."

"I'm living a full life and so can other men. I can get everything I want without marrying."

"I see what other men are going through with marriage and they're miserable. I want none of that!"

"Married and divorced men have confided in me that marrying was the biggest mistake they've ever made."

"It's great to have no legal entanglements with women."

"I have plenty of things to do and spend my money on; I don't need a woman in my business giving me orders and spending my money. I have enough to deal with. I don't need the problems of someone else to deal with, too."

"Here's what I did this past weekend... whatever I wanted to do. I didn't have to ask permission or do a bunch of things I didn't want to do. Every weekend is like that! It's GREAT!"

"I don't have to deal with in-laws, I don't have to deal with a wife being upset with someone in her family, or one of her friends."

(You can have a girlfriend and and if they ask why you're not married, ask why should get married. They will probably say something about what your girlfriend wants. You can either say your girlfriend doesn't want to get married or that you're not going to sign a state contract just because someone else wants you to.)

B) Currently Married. As with the Divorced/Divorcing/Separated character below, they may try to say your mistake is not representative, or that you were bad at picking a spouse, or that it must be because of a mistake you made (which is an unfair tactic, because nobody is perfect, but if imperfection is to blame for a marriage being bad, then all marriages should be bad), but you should point out that MOST marriages fail.

They might also say you should have known your wife was like this before you married. But people CAN hide who they are, and this is how MOST wives are.

"Marrying was the biggest mistake I've ever made."

"I walk on eggshells. I can't be honest. I can't be myself. I have to be extremely careful with what I say and how I say it." Be prepared with examples of normal things a husband might say to which a wife might overreact. Again, they might ask why you married such a woman, but insist she didn't behave like this before you married.

"She's cheating," or "She cheated." Do NOT agree that you weren't paying enough attention to her, or you weren't a good lover, or you let yourself go. You have to work to provide for the family but you try to spend as much time with the the family as you can, but you have to work. She cheated at work or took advantage of her free time from not working or working less.

"I found out my kids are from affairs." Don't let them steer the conversation to those kids being yours despite the biology. Say you're spending your life and money raising someone else's kids. 

"She buys things we don't need over my objections."

"Therapy made things worse." For example, you got blamed for everything.

"I've spent so much time and money on seminars, retreats, books, and programs, and it hasn't made things better."

"She sexually rejects me." You're not getting enough or any sex; things she used to do she won't any more (if they dare ask, say oral sex.) They'll blame you. But say you had great sexual relationships before you married. Say she was hot to trot before you married/had kids. Say you're attentive and focused on making sure she enjoys sex, but she rejects you anyway. Or you can say you waited for marriage (at least with her) and so had no way of knowing. In my case, I know from past experience it isn't me. It's her.

"I have to endure a lot of arguing, nagging, careless mistakes on her part."

"She hid her mental health history from me. She's been suicidal before."

"She gets violent - throwing things, breaking things, attacking me."

"My work performance is being hurt by my marriage. I've had to pass on promotions because my wife won't agree to the necessary changes, I can't network because it means communicating with women. I have to deal with my wife calling or texting with demands and problems. 

"She's given me grief whenever I've wanted to spend time with friends. If we include her, she acts terribly."

"My wife has gained a lot of weight and cut her hair short. She doesn't try to look good anymore." (Have a weight and height handy; Dr. Laura will ask how much weight she's gained and what it is now.) 

"My wife doesn't keep up the home, do laundry, or cook." You can only do so much, since it is your responsibility to "provide and protect."

"I have no power. She can kick me out of my own home with one call to the police. My only power is to leave, but I'll hurt and lose my kids, lose my home, lose over half of everything, have to pay two legal teams, and have to pay alimony." (This will be important when Dr. Laura accuses you of "not being man" or being limp, or having no balls. "If I hadn't married, she wouldn't have this power.")

"I feel so trapped. If I leave, I'll hurt and lose my kids, lose my home, lose over half of everything, have to pay two legal teams, and have to pay alimony."

"Either she's changed or she was only pretending to be interested in things I like, pretending I was funny. Now she wants me to change."

"I pretend to be happy. I tell others I'm happy. Otherwise, there'll be hell to pay. But I'm miserable."

"I've heard the same thing from my married friends and co-workers." 

It is important to make the point it isn't just you, it isn't just your wife, it isn't just your marriage. It's MOST marriages.


C) Divorced/Divorcing/Separated - Adapt the messages from above (Married) as appropriate. And here are more specifically for someone divorced, divorcing, or separated. 

"She physically attacked me, but I got taken away/arrested."

"I got kicked out of my house and still had to pay for it."

"She's made false allegations against me, and it's like I'm presumed guilty."

"She's alienating my kids from me."

"My life is in the hands of strangers in the family courts."

"I got killed in divorce. I lost over half of everything. On top of that, I had to pay for my lawyers and her lawyers, I'm paying alimony, and I'm paying child support."

NOTE: If you're divorced, Dennis Prager will ask if you'd never drive again if you got into a car accident. To that, you can say "I wouldn't drive ever again if there was a majority risk that every time I drove, I'd get into a terrible accident, lose half of everything I own, hurt my kids, and have to pay other people on an ongoing basis."


Whatever your character, don't let them dismiss it as isolated or something wrong with you: MOST MARRIAGES FAIL and MARRIAGE IS A BAD DEAL FOR MOST MEN.


2. General Messages:

In addition to the messages above, you should try to get these messages out.

"DO NOT GET MARRIED. What we call marriage now is a sham." Granted, this is simply an assertion, but it can sometimes be enough to hear a man say it out loud. And hopefully, you'll be able to get more of your messages out, so you can explain WHY most men shouldn't marry. 

"Marriage is a bad deal for men. Marriage brings guaranteed obligations, restrictions, and problems, but no guaranteed benefit. It transfers wealth from men to women."

"Most marriages fail. When you total up the divorces and the marriages that don't legally divorce but are miserable, that's MOST. There's a reason there are so many marriage therapists and counselors, so many divorce lawyers, marriage ministries, marriage retreats, books, you name it. "

"Marriage strike." Getting those two words in can save lives. If a man does a search on that phrase, he can find help.

"Mig-tauw"/M-G-T-O-W/Men Going Their Own Way. Same as above.

"I noticed that this is one of many problems that could be avoided by not marrying at all." This one is applicable to a wide range of topics.

"A man doesn't have to get married. A man can have a full, productive, honorable, happy life without ever marrying. Being unmarried is the default." 

"A man doesn't need a wife. A man can have a complete home and social life, even a full sex life, without a wife."

"Most men shouldn't marry. If  you think you're the exception, odds are, you aren't."

"More people, more men, are unmarried than ever before." Free men are NOT alone! A larger percentage of people than ever before are unmarried. More men are unmarried now than at any other time in this country's history, so unmarried men are not alone. "Being unmarried is a default."

"It's never been easier to live alone." Really. It's not hard. Most people can do it.

"Excelling in your career will be easier if you're unmarried and childfree. You don't have to defer to your wife, you can work the hours and days you want, you can network, take trips, and move as needed."

"Marriage is from a bygone era. We don't live in rural villages anymore. We are more likely to move, change careers, and live longer. It's ridiculous to pledge 70, 60, or 50 years to one person."

"I/you don't need to make someone else's problems my/your problems."

"There is no benefit to marrying that a man can't get without marrying. Or, the benefits are outweighed by the negatives. It's a sacrifice he shouldn't make."

"Men gain social value, women lose value. A man can get more and more attractive women as he ages. Women get jaded, fat, wrinkly, dry, dumpy, and sick. They go through hormonal problems."

"All power a husband has is at the voluntary delegation of his wife. This is a turn-off to most women and thus kills marriages. When a man marries, any power he has is transferred to his wife."

"When a married person is murdered, their spouse is usually a prime suspect. What does that tell you?"

"Some states, like California, have lifetime alimony. That's in addition to having to pay two legal teams and losing at least half of everything, and on top of child support, which might last through college."

"Judges can ignore prenups."

"You have have more and better sex unmarried than married. If you're married, you're stuck or hindered. Plenty of married men are unhappy with their sex lives."

"Avoid legal or financial entanglements with women. Do not live with, impregnate, marry, co-sign or agree to exclusivity."

"The Christian Bible does not command marriage, nor does it appear to be important in the New Testament. We aren't alone and we have reproduced and filled the Earth. The Bible doesn't say to get a state license or even describe what marriage is, beyond uniting of a bride and groom. Polygamy is depicted throughout the Bible."

"We don't know if she's a good wife until its all over. People CAN hide who they are for years until they think you're trapped. That's how we get spies, moles, undercover law enforcement infiltrators, and the like."

"It's a Mexican standoff with the state, except that you're the only one unarmed. It brings more government into your life."

"In most cases, she wants the wedding and everything that goes with it; she doesn't really want to be married to you. You're ruining her life if you marry her. Listen to how wives talk about their husbands and their lives. She settling. She wants one of the top ten percent of men, and most likely, that's not you."

"Your relationship isn't going to get better. You'll just get better at pretending and accepting."

"Women use sex as a loss leader until they think you're trapped. The sex is never going to get better. It's going to get worse. If you're "waiting" for marriage to have sex, you're setting yourself for significant risk of a terrible sex life."

"If you want to love authentically and honestly, marriage hinders that. You can't be honest because it will cause problems. Marriage brings in the state and finances, so you can't be honest and authentic without risking severe consequences."

"What if I came to you and said I have a deal for you. I'm going to take over half of your earnings. You're going to lose control over your life. I'll decide if and when you're going to have sex. I'm going to nag you, criticize you, and argue with you, often irrationally. I'm going to interfere in every aspect of your life to make things worse. If you leave or it I decide to leave, you'll have to pay me in perpetuity after paying for two legal teams. In return, there is nothing beneficial guaranteed.  You can get kicked of your own home and still have to pay for it, and pay for kids that aren't yours. You'd tell me to get lost. But that's what marriage is." (You're extremely good and lucky if you can get all of that on a radio show.)

Be prepared for these retorts, challenges, or objections:

"You're not a real man." "You don't want to grow up." "You're selfish."

You're wrong, but I'm OK with you thinking that while I get to enjoy freedom. 

"You're just bitter."

Whether or not I'm bitter, the fact is that MOST marriages fail.

"You're bad at picking."

The fact is, MOST marriages fail. So most people are bad at picking. That's all the more reason for men to avoid marriage.

"You've got flaws, too!" "Marriage isn't all a bed of roses for women, either."

Yes I do. All the more reason for me not to marry, so that nobody else has to deal with me.
 
"But won't you be lonely? Who will take care of you?" 

No, I'm not lonely, I have friends. And professionals will take care of me. I can afford that since I didn't spend money on a wife.

"Don't you want someone to come home to? Don't you want someone at your side as you grow old? On your deathbed..."

No. I don't want a wife waiting for me at home. That just means more chores, nagging, and bills, and less freedom with what I do when I get home.

How many married men come home to an empty house or an terrible wife? MOST!

I don't want to watch some woman grow old. 

On my deathbed I'll be busy dying.

"Using people isn't nice."

How am I using anyone? This is a mutual exchange of time. I haven't promised marriage to anyone.

"She will want/expect marriage."

That's on her. She's an adult who can make her own decisions. I want things, too. Does my wanting them obligate a woman to give them to me?

"I'm happy in my marriage." 

So you say. Are you really free to say differently? 

You HAVE to say that. 

Maybe you are, for now. 

You're in the minority. 

(Dennis Prager is on his third marriage.)

"What's the alternative?" 

The alternative is that people are responsible for themselves, and they have voluntary relationships rather than a coercive Mexican standoff with the state. Also, plenty of men will still be foolish enough to marry. I want any man who hears my voice to know that they can have a great life without marrying.

"Marriage is good for society."

Then society should incentive men to marry rather than making it such a bad deal for men.

There is no hard evidence that marriage is good for society. It's an assertion based on a prejudiced worldview and supposed correlations.

If marriage is good for society, it isn't the state contract that makes it so. It is, in part, a woman choosing to be a good wife and mother. Most women don't do that anymore.

"Single men are dangerous. They commit the most crime."

Young men are dangerous, and young people are less likely to be married. IT doesn't mean that them being single makes them prone to crime. I'm not/wasn't dangerous, and there's no reason the same can't be true for more free men.

Your implication is women should marry violent men to change them. Why would a woman marry a violent man? How long should she put up with abuse?

"Marriage helps you grow/mature."

People say the same thing about being dumped in the middle of the ocean and having to survive. I still wouldn't recommend that. 

What does this even mean?

There are mature men who never married.

"Marriage is living for someone else."

It sure is for men. But people can live for each other without a legal marriage. 

"Married men are better off."

That's putting the cart before the horse. Women want to marry men who are better off. They are more likely to leave a man who loses his job or gets sick. To give you an idea, if a woman ruins her husband's life, divorces him, and he commits suicide, the data on him make it look like being unmarried (divorced) was bad. But he might not have committed suicide if he'd never married. 

Misleading statistics never separate out intentionally unmarried men to compare to husbands. There are men who've avoided marriage who are doing very well.

Many religious men think it would be a sin or a negative confession to say they were or would be better off unmarried, so often studies and surveys aren't based on honest answers. Something like the Stockholm Syndrome can also skew results. Some men are self-deluded. We often have no knowledge of what is really going on behind closed doors, and many husbands aren't honest about it.

Men are better off compared to what? A Free Man can earn half of what his married counterpart does and live a better life. 

Many married men lie about being happy, because they think that telling the truth will get them into trouble.

"Married men have more and better sex."

Oh really?

"Don't you want to live a full life?"

Yes, and that's exactly why I won't marry. I can live a much fuller life without being hindered by a wife.

There are some things I don't want to experience, like getting run over by a bus, or getting married.

"You just haven't found the right woman."

Yes, a 21 year-old billionaire bikini model loyal nymphomaniac who never ages?

There is no right woman. 

"This is sad."

What's sad is men feeling like beaten, trapped dogs, desperately trying to please an irrational owner who can't be pleased.

"Children need a married mother and father."

Vasectomies are great! Mine was easy. One of the best things I ever did.


Note: Usually, it will be better to use declarative sentences rather than phrasing your statements as questions, because asking a question invites the host or other person to attempt to contradict your point with an answer. 


3) Getting On the Air

You WILL get screened, meaning you're going to have to talk to at least one "call screener" who is there to decide if you belong on the show and to prepare you to talk on the air.

• Look up the call-in number ahead of time, if you can, and program it into your phone.
• If you don't already know the exact topic of the next hour, and it isn't open lines or whatever, listen just before the top of the hour, and, if need be, at the start of the hour and call in immediately.
• Call with a good connection in a quiet place, and pay close attention. Use either a "land line" phone or, if you're using a mobile phone, make sure it is charged and you're using a working earpiece and microphone.
• Speak clearly.
• Tell the call screener you want to talk about something that's sounds interesting and relevant. Don't say "I want to talk about something interesting and relevant." Rather, you have to come up with something to tell the screener that's interesting and relevant, something that will allow you to squeeze in some of the messages above into your call. Most likely, you'll say "I want to talk to [title/name of the host] about [topic that the host is discussing]. What I want to say/ask is..."
• Do what the screener tells you. Turn down your radio. 
• Pay attention!!! You might hear the show on your phone, but it might "jump ahead" when the host takes your all.

4) Executing the Call

Know what you're going to say BEFORE you call. It could be asking a question, telling a quick story, making a statement, depending on the show. It could be the perils of marriage, the glories of being single, the facts of life. Prioritize your messages so that the most important thing is front-loaded, and get out as much as the host will allow you.

Sound calm, clear, together, and firm.

Time is of the essence. Don't waste a lot of time with greetings, saying the name you picked, asking how the host is doing, mentioning the prior caller, or mentioning the call screener or that you called in or were listening. They already know that!!! You CAN say, "Great topic," or even "Thank you for taking my call," but that's it. GET TO IT!!! 

INTERACT with the host. If you just try to spew your message out and it sounds like you ignored the host, you're toast. DO NOT SWEAR, DO NOT MENTION SOME OTHER RADIO OR MEDIA PERSONALITY unless they are the guest or the topic.

DO STICK (at least initially) TO WHAT YOU TOLD THE SCREENER. Despite what any host might pretend, the screener does write down on a computer screen what you said you were going to talk about, and the host does see that before taking your call, and if you seem to be saying something different than what you told the screener, they hang up on you.

They control the microphone and can hang up on you. Also, they can "dump" what you say as even the "live" shows have a delay, but they will usually only use that to keep profanity or slander from going out on the show. However, a lot of shows actually record the calls instead of airing them live, and will edit them. 

The important thing is getting a red pill or multiple red pills to the audience, even if the host pretends like they refuted your message.


Notes on Talking With Dennis Prager

The Dennis Prager Show is usually live, Monday-Friday, 9am Pacific/Noon Eastern to Noon Pacific/3pm Eastern.

Dennis Prager usually picks disagreeing callers, so keep that in mind, but don't say anything obnoxious to the screener. Maybe it is a partial disagreement. Whatever will work.

DO NOT CALL HIM "Prager." Call him "Dennis."

Dennis likes a back-and-forth, so you have to let him talk when he wants to talk.

Dennis asks questions, and prefers that to argument. 

Almost every week, Dennis Prager has an Ultimate Issues hour (Tuesdays at 11am Pacific, 2pm Eastern), a Male-Female hour (Wednesdays at 10am Pacific, 1pm Eastern), a Happiness Hour (Fridays at 10am Pacific, 1pm Eastern) and an Open Lines hour (Fridays at 11am Pacific, 2pm Eastern).

The open lines hour is good, since he takes calls on almost anything during that hour. It might especially help if your call appears to reference that week's Male-Female hour. Obviously, the Male-Female hour itself is another good opportunity, if you can make your call sound relevant to the specific topic being addressed. Both the Ultimate Issues and Happiness hours might occasionally be fertile territory, too. If you listen to his show other hours, he might bring up the topic of marriage, relationships, dating, the differences between the sexes, or something else that would allow you to call and tell the screener something relevant to the topic. His Ultimate Issues Hour is often related to his column that hits the web Tuesday morning or Monday night.

Keep in mind where Dennis is coming from, He strongly advocates marriage, saying that men aren't real men if they don't marry and raise a family. But he admits the family courts can be terrible to husbands/fathers. He's into his third marriage, to a woman who has a child with special needs. Dennis is very concerned that single men cause crime, and that unmarried women vote Democrat. 

Notes on Talking With Dr. Laura

Call her "Dr, Laura" or "Dr. Schlessinger" (if you can pronounce it right.)

Do whatever you can to NOT "talk over" her, even if she jumps in and interrupts you mid-sentence after asking you a question.

The show runs live from 11am Pacific/2pm Eastern to 2pm Pacific/5pm Eastern, Monday through Friday. Dr. Laura usually doesn't have dedicated hours, although every once in a while she'll say "Call in if..." or "I don't want any more calls today about..." Usually, every hour is for her to take calls on relationship/marriage, friendship, or parenting problems; moral dilemmas; comebacks; life choices; self-improvement; etc.

There is ample opportunity (see below) to call in with something that fits into one of those categories. They are supposed to be real life situations, not hypotheticals, so don't call with "What if..." calls. Call with something you are supposedly dealing with. 

That means your call MUST fit into one of the categories above. Example: "My mother has repeatedly asked me when I'm going to get married. How do I handle that?" (She will probably tell you she can't fix normal, but might ask you about your history. It would be a good chance to explain why you don't want to marry.) You can describe bad behavior or a red flag by a girlfriend, and say from you can tell, most women act or are this way. Or, describe your brother's wife this way, or your wife this way, and ask how you can handle it. (I should probably come up with a separate post with a list of examples of calls you can make.)

Her show IS NOT FOR POLITICS OR CURRENT EVENTS OR NEWS TALK, even if she occasionally brings up those topics.

Dr. Laura refuses to debate or argue. That means you're going to have to ask a question, or tell a story, or answer her question in a way that will our messages out. She is fond of saying "all the research indicates" whatever her stance is. You might be able to ask how old that research is.

She might put you on hold and say she wants to get your wife or anyone else you mentioned on the phone so she can deal with both of you. But if you've already put your message out there, mission is accomplished.

If you present yourself as married, separated, or divorced, and you didn't stick to the "Dr. Laura Plan," then she will blame your deviation for whatever your problem is. So you dated for two years, got premarital counseling for six (or nine) months with a LMFT, got married no younger than 28, didn't shack up, didn't have any kids until after you married. You both lived on your own (as opposed to with your parents) for years before you married. Neither of you had been married before, nor had any kids. You met either through being introduced by mature, quality friends or friends of your family, or some wholesome activity (church, charity, etc.) - NOT ONLINE!!!

In addition to calling in to the show (and commenting on the show's Facebook page), if you email the show, either through the website or by emailing DrLaura [at] DrLaura [dot] com and include your phone number, someone from the show might call you to line you up as a caller. 

Dr. Laura has had unfilled lines frequently the last year or so, so there's a good chance you can get on the air.

Keep in mind what Dr. Laura's positions are. No shacking up. "Everyone" wants to get married. Men are walking ATM machines and that's EXPECTED; it can't even be counted as something you do for your wife. She thinks men owe women money for sex, ideally over half of their income. If women want to have children they should stay home to raise them. At this link is what makes men marriage material, according to her.

With your help, we can warn more men.