One student I've kept in touch with recently admitted his romantic love for me.
This is not unusual, thought I tended to look at my teachers as... teachers. I don't recall thinking much about their personal lives at all. I was there to learn from them, they were there to teach me.
"Kyle" is now in his 20s and on his own. As his teacher 10 years ago, I'd never have dreamed of this happening.
You should have been warned about this.
What's difficult is I think I reciprocate those feelings. I never expected the man I connect with most to be a former student, but Kyle is an adult and I know him as such.
She goes on to express her hesitation as well as her openness to this being the love of her life, asking if it would be inappropriate to follow her heart.
Wyoming is generally not the place I think of when I think of attractive women. I'm sure there are some there. But the most attractive young women tend to gravitate to the large metropolitan areas, especially the warmer ones, because there are more men with money, power, and fame to compete for her affections, and more opportunities for her to show off what she has. Think Los Angeles, Dallas, and Miami. Anyway, Kyle has an attraction, but it could be some unrealistic fantasy, especially a teacher-student fantasy, and his infatuation may give way to disillusionment. Or, maybe he's genuinely and deeply drawn to her. Hopefully, it is the latter.
If she's been teaching for ten years, then she's probably at least 32. She doesn't explain what grade she teaches, but Kyle is, at the oldest, 28. A wife being four years older can certainly work. Now, if he's 21, then the long-term prospects aren't so good.
I don't see any moral problem with her dating him. Dear Abby agrees, though warns that she should expect gossip and should be prepared to relocate. Good advice.
I'd bet money (if I was a wagerin’ man) that some male teachers and coaches in WONDERING's area are married to former students.
The girlfriend I had the longest relationship with (before my wife) was starting her teaching career when we first started dating. She had an amazing body. No matter how conservatively she dressed, she couldn't hide her DD breasts, and at least once, jealous female students falsely accused her of flaunting them. The funny thing was, that girlfriend failed to accept that she had a great body. She was teaching middle schoolers the first year, and she asked me if she should make male students work at the chalkboard. It took me a second to get the real meaning of her question, but once I understood, I advised her that it would be best to let the students stay in their seats. At that age, boys are getting erections all of time with little rhyme or reason, but her presence was plenty of reason. Those poor boys didn't stand a chance. Even if they cared more about the caboose. Or legs. She was all good.
So, ladies and gentlemen... did you have a crush on any of your teachers? Or whether as a student or adult, do you have any experience with a situation like this? Would you tell the letter writer not to do it?