Tuesday, August 29, 2023

Running Game - Do Not Care

Free Clipart: Magic Hat and Wand | gnokii
Running game isn't just about saving money, time, and effort. It is also about reducing "emotional labor," as the younger generations like to say.

Recently, a young man went to the front door of the house where his ex-girlfriend was. He ended up literally breaking in, and was immediately and fatally shot by the father of his ex. This was recorded on video.

Why was he so determined to gain access?

I don't know any the history of that relationship, nor do I know what personality or mental disorders he might have had, or his history of violence.

What I do know is that some people who have otherwise had stellar behavior have lost control of themselves when it comes to relationships, especially when there are arguments, disagreements, or breakups.

A 22 year-old man shouldn't have a girlfriend and thus shouldn't have an ex-girlfriend. When a guy buys into the dung that's been shoveled on top of him about romance, "winning" a woman, pursuing a woman, "making" a relationship "work," and, goodness forbid, the concept of soulmates, being "meant to be together," or the importance of "first love" or "your first," he gets so invested that he becomes irrational, and might become dangerous. There are guys who are delusional enough to think "She's the best I could ever do! I have to have her back!" They've "invested" so much time, money, emotion, pride, and whatever else into a relationship that they feel they must be together at all costs.

Men, especially young men, need to drop any hint of ownership or fixation in relationships. Stop caring. Stop investing so much money, time, energy, or "trying to make it work." Don't have "a" girlfriend. Date a woman if/when she wants. Otherwise, go see another woman. Play the field. Go down your list. Spin those plates.

If you're feeling like you MUST see her, MUST talk with her, or like you have any ownership over her attention, time, or body, or feeling frustrated or angry to the point of destruction or violence, you've gone off track. If you ever get into a fight over a woman you're dating, you've gone off track.

Very, very few relationships last.

You don't own her. She doesn't own you. She doesn't have to date you, no matter how long she's dated you, no matter how great those dates seemed, no matter what she has ever said to you, no matter what you've done for her; she can stop dating you immediately for any or no reason whatsoever, and you have to accept that.

There's a whole world of willing women out there who will date you. New women are aging into the game every day. Stop caring about one who doesn't want to date you any more. You shouldn't have cared much in the first place. NOT caring is quite liberating.

I think back to my earliest relationships, and how much effort I put in to keeping them going. I cringe at the thought. But I learned better, to the point there was one woman I was dating and, at the end of one of our dates, she said she had recently seen her longtime prior boyfriend again and she was going back to him. Was I hurt? Was I upset? NOT AT ALL! Because I had been enjoying the dates for what they were, and we were never a couple, and I could spend that time dating women even more fun than her or enjoying time with my friends or hobbies. I didn't have any of her stuff and she didn't have any of mine. We hadn't exchanged expensive gifts or had expensive dates. I had already had the most enjoyment from dating her that I would likely ever have.

Run game. Don't expect exclusivity and don't agree to it. Play the field. Don't think of any of the women as your girlfriend. They aren't. They are women you're dating as long as both of you want to date. If either one of you doesn't want to date each other, you don't date each other anymore (unless and until you both want to go on a date together again.) Do not threaten, do not grovel, do not plead, do not stalk, don't text her, do not spend any time worrying or being angry or waiting for her. Don't try to "win" her back. DO NOT CARE. Move on.

That works if you've been doing it - NOT CARING - from the start. Getting emotionally invested will not give you any advantage. Quite the opposite.

Again, you need to get to the point that when a woman won't see you again, you shrug your shoulders and text the next one.

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