Wednesday, May 18, 2011

She Has It and Flaunts It

How revealing is too revealing? And does it change as an adult gets older? PRIM AND PROPER IN OKLAHOMA wrote in to Dear Abby:

My mother-in-law, "Kay" -- who is in her 50s -- dresses like she's in her teens or 20s.
What does that mean, exactly? Well, read on.

Don't get me wrong, she looks great. She exercises several hours a day to keep in shape and follows a strict diet.

Kay wears spaghetti-strap shirts and short skirts in the summer, and bikinis to sunbathe. I understand that she wants to show off her body, but is there a way to direct her to more age-appropriate clothing?
So... bikinis, short skirts, and spaghetti-straps are okay for teens? But not for a woman in her 50s?

Dear Abby responded:

You are well-intentioned, but if you are wise, you will refrain from giving your mother-in-law any unasked-for fashion advice.
That's for sure. I'm not so sure about the well-intentioned bit, though. She could just be jealous. A lot of women can't stand it when another women draws attention while in their presence.

Anyone think the MIL would take the criticism well, and would change how she dresses as a result?

Any of you know anyone like either of these women... perhaps it is you?

Here's the argument I've heard from some of my fellow religious conservatives (Christian and otherwise). "None of that is appropriate at any age because it causes men to think of women as sex objects or have impure thoughts." I've also heard that some of that is fine for available women, but not for women who are making a commitment. Then there's the reverse - religions in which married women can wear blue jeans, but unmarried women (who are all supposedly virgins... which often means they only have sex with guys outside of the family religion/social circle) can't wear jeans, but instead wear really long skirts. And learn how to walk in short strides.

What say you? Back in my bachelor days I wouild insert some joke here about sending me a picture if you're not sure what is appropriate so that I could tell you one way or the other.

1 comment:

  1. Here's MY take: After my last baby, I figured out how to eat and exercise and get my body into single digit sizes. It takes some dedication and I was pretty proud of myself. For the first time in my entire life, I had both a bikini worthy body AND the confidence to wear one. So I did. And my oldest child told me he didn't think I should be showing off my boobies so much. So I also have a nice, modest one-piece.

    I don't care what random strangers, men or women, think, but I do care what my children think. He's only 9, but he senses something not right about mom strutting around mostly nekkid. I respect that. If I go swimming alone or just with my husband, perhaps the bikini, but when children or the easily offended are around, perhaps something more.

    It would be nice if we could all just find a happy balance between not being offended and not causing offense ...


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