Another Day Orphanage Horror Story

I haven't been getting around to Dear Margo enough lately, because there are more important things to do than publish my opinions on advice column content in this obscure online outlet. But here I am.

Disgusted in Ohio wrote:

My first cousin, "Lily," is a living, breathing waste of space. This girl had her first child at 15, her second at 17.

That's not a waste! I need someone to do the hard labor that I don't want to do, or ring up my purchases, and do it for cheap. Statistically, she and her children will be more likely than others to end up with jobs in those categories.

Subsequently, she's had two more.

Great. Another example of one of the reasons guys who are just looking for sex and don't want to be fathers should avoid single mothers.

When her first child was 4 months old, Lily’s mother died, and she came to live with our family, along with the baby.

Where was her father? Looks like she is repeating the cycle.

My mom did everything she could to help them, even quitting her job to watch Lily's child while Lily went to high school full time.

That was a mistake on your mother's part.

Lily never cared for her child.

She didn't have to. She had an enabler. And this is why she had more. And more than one guy thought it was a good idea to knock her up.

She stole checks from her roommate and ended up in jail.

Not surprising.

Fast-forward: Her oldest child was adopted by my parents and is now my 12-year-old brother.

Lucky boy.

Her second child was adopted by other family members. The third child, which she had while incarcerated, was adopted by a couple in my hometown, and the fourth child's paternal grandparents took custody because she was such a poor mother.

All of those children are probably better off. And at least she didn't have her kids slaughtered.

The reason I'm writing is, after all of this, I've learned that Lily is providing a DAY CARE service in her home.

Is that really so surprising? How many criminals end up doing paid or voluntary work related to their past criminal behavior – for ill or for good? How many people who have been involved in some sort of dysfunction or immorality have made a career based on talking about it or doing some work related to it? The thing is, she knows how some of her customers feel. They want someone else to take care of their kids, which is just how she felt.

She's gallivanting around, making people think she's a wonderful person and a caring "mother" to her boyfriend's children, even though her criminal record would make it impossible for her to obtain licensure in the state of Ohio.

Her boyfriend's children. Yup... more chaos. This guy, who apparently knocked up a woman more than once when it wasn't the right person or conditions, now leaves his children in the care of this woman. It's bad enough that he thinks having sex with her is a good idea (especially after she had four children), but to leave his own kids in her care?

I really think the parents of the children she "cares for" deserve to know who is watching their children.

They're free to ask to see her daycare license.

I'm requesting two things of you: First, I'm wondering whether there are any agencies I can contact about putting a stop to this. Second, please remind your readers to be very careful about with whom they leave their children.

Things are pretty bad when people need Dear Margo to remind them of that. If the children are being neglected or otherwise abused, call your local child protective services agency.

Leaving children in the care of strangers should be an absolute last resort. Most of the people who "need" to leave their children in day care have decided poorly about many things up to that point. People who make good decisions about education, career and if, who, and when to marry, and if and when to have children almost never “need” day care.