Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Calm Down

Dr. Laura handled a call so well during the second hour of her show on Thursday, May 16 that she should put the call on her website for other women to listen to as needed.

There was a woman who called who described her husband as a generally good man. She was very, upset, however, that he was viewing porn. As Dr. Laura's questions revealed, it was garden variety heterosexual adult porn, and the hubby had been stressed lately. Dr. Laura explained that he was relieving his stress while trying not to bother his wife, who is tired out from a newborn. He was not neglecting her.

There are many socially conservative talk show hosts and commentators who would have played to the woman's insecurities (and many of the women in the audience) by strongly condemning the husband as though what he was doing the the worst thing ever and prescribing "rehab" for his "porn addiction".

Instead, Dr. Laura confronted the issue head-on. She told the caller that yes, those women have better bodies than her. She darn near rubbed it in. She also went on to explain male sexuality and emotion (something very few women understand) to the point where I think the caller was no longer on a ledge, and gave the caller advice on how to handle the situation.

I'm sure a lot of women listening were upset that it didn't become a male-bashing session. However, it would have been a very different call if he had called. Dr. Laura would have steered him towards better ways to relieve his stress. Dr. Laura has to deal with the callers. She can't give advice to someone who is not calling. It was the wife calling, so Dr. Laura told her what to do, not what the hubby should or shouldn't do.

Dr. Laura is not a Christian, but she deals with a lot of Christian callers and is listened to many Christians. It is very popular in evangelical churches/media these days to  constantly rail on about porn being one of the worst things possible. Meanwhile, I hear very little about what's wrong with gossip, romantic comedies, soap operas, greed/overspending/impulse buying and gluttony/sloth/obesity. Could that have anything to do with the churches appealing to women and not men? Naaaaaah.

Most men like to see well-placed molecules, images of well-placed molecules, images of people having sex. That's male biology, as fallen as it is. However, for most men, there no sight they'd rather see more than their own wife naked. No model, no porn star, no other woman can compete for a man's attention when his wife is naked in front of him.

Obviously, there are other ways for men to relieve stress and I'm not giving a blanket defense of porn. Perspective is often lost when we deal with this topic, though. Dr. Laura and Dennis Prager are very helpful in providing that perspective.

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