Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Becker and the Pecker

This is going to be... big... news. Maybe you've already heard it. From the Orange County Register:

A woman is behind bars after police say she poisoned her husband, cut off his penis and threw it in the garbage disposal because he "deserved it."
He probably "deserved" it the way some women "deserve" to be beaten or sexually assaulted.

At about 9 p.m. Monday, officers went to a home in the 1400 block of Flower Street [Garden Grove, California] after a woman called 911 and reported a medical emergency, Garden Grove police Lt. Jeff Nightengale said.

Officers found a 51-year-old man tied to the bed and bleeding from his groin, he said. The man, who has not been identified, underwent emergency surgery at UCI Medical Center in Orange and was listed in serious condition, Nightengale said.

The 48-year-old woman, Catherine Kieu Becker, is accused of using an unknown poison or drug in her husband's food to make him sleepy, Nightengale said. She then tied him to the bed and, as he woke up, she cut off his penis with a knife, Nightengale said.
That would make it premeditated. Perhaps a lawyer will still manage to come up with a hormone defense.

The victim told detectives that he believed there was something wrong with the food Becker prepared for him, Nightengale said.
So he was complaining about her cooking? Is that why he deserved it? Oh, wait, he means that he was poisoned.

Becker and the victim are going through a divorce, he said.
Okay guys, one of the first rules about divorce is STAY AWAY FROM HER!

Becker was arrested on suspicion of aggravated mayhem, false imprisonment, assault with a deadly weapon, administering a drug with intent to commit a felony, poisoning and spousal abuse, Nightengale said.
What, no "illegal dumping of biological" waste? Let's see if she is actually held accountable.

Crazy women are fun in bed. Until they cut off your pecker.

By the way, it's California, so even if she is guilty, she is STILL entitled to half of the marital assets, and, if he earned more than her, alimony. Now, he can certainly sue her for what she (allegedly) did to him, and I hope he does.

Men, choose wisely. Add this woman to the "Do Not Date" list.

1 comment:

  1. This story longs to be made into an epic poem, I feel.

    And a lot of bad jokes.


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