Don't Dogs Bite?

It has to be bad enough being a homeless dog without some smelly man using you to get off. Young women and girls who think it is flattering that a guy wants to stick it in them should remember stories like this. Andrew Blankstein reports on this Los Angeles Times blog.

A transient who sexually assaulted a dog he had adopted from an animal shelter has been sentenced to three years' probation, officials with the Los Angeles city attorney's office said Tuesday.

Wade Strickland, 62, pleaded guilty to animal cruelty and lewd conduct in connection with a Feb. 2 incident in which he was seen sexually violating the female German shepherd mix beneath a freeway underpass and was arrested by the Los Angeles Police Department Animal Cruelty Task Force.

Oh, thank goodness the dog was female. Otherwise, what he did would have been strange.

Judge Mary Lou Villar also ordered Strickland not to own or possess any animals, submit to searches by the LAPD and Department of Animal Services for animals at any time and attend two dozen animal care counseling sessions.

Animal care? Really?

Officials with the city attorney's office said Strickland had previously adopted numerous dogs from the South Los Angeles Animal Shelter.

So he's a player, that cad. Can't stay faithful.

He had been reported for both mistreating his animals and indecent exposure but never had been previously prosecuted.

You mean he was seen exposing his shortcomings?

At the time of his arrest, Strickland was "found with two dogs, including the victim, and pornographic material in his possession," according to the city prosecutors.

Porn? Oh, now you know he's a bad man. The prosecuter and the newspaper cite the porn as if it caused him to molest a dog. If porn was to blame, no animal in the nation would be safe. So he was found with "two dogs, including the victim". I wonder if the other dog was like, "What, I'm not attractive enough?"

The abused dog, which had no visible trauma, was successfully adopted following the incident, officials said.

Seriously, I'm glad the dog has no visibile trauma and found a home.

An item like this always draws plenty of comments from readers. People are unhappy that he just got probation, but would prison be all that bad for a transient? I mean, he'd be getting free shelter, food, medical care, entertainment? Sure, he wouldn’t have a dog to abuse, but you have to consider a the tradeoff.

Amish Brothers Accused of Doing Bad Things

...to kids and with animals. The text of this story not for the squeamish.

Where's a good Harrison Ford movie when you need one?

In Grant County, Wisconsin, the authorities believe that two Amish brothers have been doing some very evil and disturbing things, including incestuous molestation and beastiality.

Authorities issued two criminal complaints on Tuesday for the men -- Christian G. Stolzfus, 19, of Fennimore, and Dannie G. Stolzfus, 18, of Fennimore. They were the subjects of a three-month investigation by the Grant County Sheriff's Department and the county's Department of Social Services.

The men face charges involving at least six different family members and multiple animals.

Christian Stolzfus is charged with repeated sexual assault of a child, four counts of first-degree sexual assault of a child under the age of 13 without great bodily harm; attempted first-degree sexual assault of a child under the age of 13 without great bodily harm; two counts of incest; exposing genitals or pubic area; and two counts of sexual gratification with an animal. Authorities said that they believe these incidents occurred during a four-year period.

Dannie Stolzfus is charged with two counts of incest and sexual gratification with an animal. Authorities said that they believe these incidents occurred over a three-year period.

And how old were the victims?

Authorities said the victims, at the time, ranged in age from 5 to 16 years old.

And what animals were involved?

Govier said that that the animals allegedly involved were a cow and a horse.

Try a rattlesnake next time.

Now this is probably the most unbelievable line in the story:

The two men have not yet been arrested. Instead, the Grant County Sheriff's Department said they will be summoned to court to face the charges against them.

HUH?!?

If convicted of the charges, Christian Stoltzfus faces more than of 400 years in prison. Dannie Stoltzfus faces nearly 90 years in prison, if convicted.

I see... no need to arrest them because hey, there's a chance they won't have to spend the rest of their lives in prison, so they're not a flight risk, right? Sheesh. I hope all kids are being kept away from them.

This is not in anyway to excuse these guys, because they should definitely go away for a long time if they did these things, but my guess is that someone did something to these guys when they were younger. Is that person still alive and free?

Let's lighten it up a bit now...

How Does Anyone Get Like This?

From the Altoona Mirror in Altoona, Pennsylvania, comes a tale that even the writers for Law & Order: SVU would find too bizarre to use.

An Indiana County woman has been charged with having sex with a horse, state police at Indiana said Tuesday.

But that's not all.

Dovie Lee Kerner, 46, of Plumville also allegedly had sex with other animals including a dog and a pig, court documents state.

Well, I sure hope those animals are all male. Otherwise, it would be weird.

One of the officials said she received a phone call from a confidential informant who asked her if it was illegal to have sex with an animal. When told yes, the informant said he had a video on his cell phone of Kerner having sex with a horse, court documents state.

Which means he stood there watching.

He probably turned her in because she – believe it or not – had sex with other men. How dare she?

Because of Kerner's alleged sexual activities with other men and animals, the informant, who had dated the woman, and his Jack Russell terrier both contracted sexually transmitted diseases, court documents state.

Poor dog. He was probably thinking, "Hey my human's new girlfriend is cool. She's nice to me. Hey... wait a minute...she's being a little too friendly with me... what's that I smell on her?!?"

What will she tell the other inmates? "Uh, I'm in for murder. Yeah, that's it."

I wonder if she'll have to stay at least 500 feet away from kennels and stables?

The real tip off was when she gave birth to a side of bacon.

You can click here if you really want to see the paperwork.

Another Example of a Serial Killer in Training

...or two serial killers. Brought to you by the Associated Press.

A New York City teenager has admitted that she failed to let a kitten out of an oven after a friend put the animal inside and left it to roast to death.

Fluffy is now Crispy.

Authorities say Cherry and a 14-year-old friend ransacked a Bronx apartment before putting the cat in the oven, where it cried and scratched before dying.

And yet there are guys out there whould be stupid enough to intentionally not only marry these gals, but impregnate them.