We Are Not a Project

I found a column by Suzanne Fields at conservative site Townhall. With a headline of "A Good Man Is Still Hard to Find" I took notice. [This entry has been bumped up.]

Women have been complaining since the original Adams family was evicted from the Garden of Eden that "A good man is hard to find."

Whining, complaining, nagging... yep.

Despite radical feminist mockery of the very idea of manliness, that men are natural sexual predators, most women -- with very few exceptions -- still want one.

Of course they do! It's nice to have the cash flow, the bodyguard, an errand boy, and a receptacle for your whines and gripes and thoughts.

The #MeToo movement has nevertheless changed a lot of things in the wake of the sexual harassment-scandal season. One of them is the regard in which men are universally held by women. It often seems we're back to the '80s, when there was a similar assault on the idea of manhood and some women decried all sex as rape.

Radical feminist activists Catherine MacKinnon and Andrea Dworkin were widely credited with saying that "all sex is rape" and "all men are rapists." They both deny the statements, but Dworkin conceded that she did say, "Penetrative intercourse is, by its nature, violent."

No wonder men are choosing to To Their Own Way (see MGTOW).

It's Hard Out Here for a Boy

Matt Walsh's latest at The Daily Wire is about the war on boys.

He wrote a surprisingly good intro:

Our culture is very bad for boys. It's bad for girls, too. It's bad for everyone. But I think we fail to recognize and appreciate the unique struggles that boys face. Partly we fail to recognize it because we are too busy worrying about the Patriarchy's persecution of women. Partly we fail to recognize it because, collectively, we just don't care that much about boys. Partly we fail to recognize it because men are not as likely to talk about their own plight. And partly a man will not talk about it because everyone, even his fellow men, will only laugh at him and downplay the problem.

Exactly.

Men are told about their privilege, but if you look at things honestly you will not see much evidence of this privilege. On the contrary, you will see several profound disadvantages suffered by men in general and boys in particular.

Hmm. Wonder if Walsh has been hit with some reality lately?

1) Our culture preys relentlessly on a boy's weaknesses.

Basically, it's about how women/girls dress all slutty and pr0n is everywhere! Of course that was first.

One Guy Who Should Not Marry

He wrote in to Dear Abby.

SENSITIVE GUY, MILWAUKEE wrote:

(First of all, you know there is a problem if he signed his letter that way.)

I am a 24-year-old male who has been in a relationship with a great woman, "Hayley," for three years.

Strike one! 21 is too young to get into a long-term relationship. He should have spent this time (aside from establishing himself professionally) dating different women to learn as much as possible about what he likes and doesn’t like and the kind of woman with whom he interacts best.

She has excellent qualities, a good job, she's super loving and would be a wonderful wife someday.

Great. But this guy's terminology makes me think we was raised without a father, and is suffering as a result.

My family loves Hayley -- but my buddies don't, and it is causing me to have mixed feelings.

Maybe your friends can see something you don't. Or maybe you've surrounded yourself with jerks for friends (and your friends tend to be a reflection on you, by the way).

Some days I love her, but on others I want to break up. Then I think of how fantastic our lives would be together. It's weird, because Hayley doesn't change her personality -- it's totally my issue.

Clearly, you aren't ready to be in a long-term relationship, and you probably stunted your growth by getting into this one at age 21. I would guess that it is his first relationship - that she's the only girl who ever paid attention to him.

I'm scared that if I break up with her it could be the worst mistake of my life, and I'll regret it.

If she is really as great and stable as you say she is, then she deserves someone better than you, and you should stop being selfish and stop wasting her time. If you are "meant to be" it will happen whether you break up now or not. People do get back together, after all.

Dear Abby gets it right when she replies:

Hayley may make a wonderful wife someday, but from your letter, YOU are nowhere near ready for marriage. Mature love doesn't blow hot and cold, and the feelings you finally experience for the woman you marry won't be dictated by the impression she makes on your buddies.

If Haley is mature, she will thank this guy for his honesty if he levels with her and breaks it off, and will take steps to distance herself from him, evaluate why she got into and stayed in a relationship with him in the first place, and add what she's learned from this experience to her decision making process, hopefully avoiding making some of the same mistakes again.

Or, if she is immature or insecure, she could plead with him to "redeem" the relationship, pressuring him to propose marriage (with the help of his family), get involved in planning the big party so much that she doesn't have to deal with the problems in the relationship, and marry the guy. Soon after that, they will likely start arguing a lot over the time he spends with his buddies. She might intentionally get pregnant, thinking that will help get things to her liking. That cycle may repeat any number of times, and then she may or may not divorce him.

Hopefully, Haley will go the first route.