"Why Can't Men Be Upfront and Honest?" - Part 6

Male nature means he's thought about it. Keep reading for an explanation of what I mean.

I've meant to write something like this for a long time now, but after seeing a couple of women on Reddit asking related questions, I'm finally doing this.

You need to sit down and brace yourself. This may come as a surprise to women, especially the more "education" they've been through, but...

Men and women are different. Some of those differences are natural, and we were born with these differences.

You might need to take a minute to recover from reading that. You might be angry with me. But it's the truth. And the sooner you accept that, the better off everyone will be. Read it as many times as you need.

You need to keep that truth in mind when you say you want men (or, "your" man) to be honest, to be vulnerable, to be open, to share things with you, to tell you what they're thinking, to share their fantasies, to not have secrets from you, etc.

Because here's one thing that it means that might startle, disturb, or disgust you, because you literally have a brain that works differently:

Men are attracted to a far wider spectrum of women than women are to men. In general, for any woman he's spent any amount of time around, he's wondered what she looks like naked, has pictured it, has likely thought at least briefly what it would be like to have sex with her, and even might have masturbated with her in his mind, no matter how briefly. This includes female neighbors and coworkers, your friends, even your sister, mother, etc. This is male biology. This is part of male sexual nature.

Are there exceptions? Yes. They include:

• Women who fall into a into the small percentage he finds absolutely hideous
• Women he grew up living with or raised (although there are many men who still think of such women)
  
• Men who aren't attracted to women
• Men who have specific kinds of trauma, disorders, or hormonal problems
• Men who  actively stop such thoughts and redirect their minds, usually due to religious convictions (this is a minority of men in any strict religion that promotes this - most don't consistently work to do this)
  

Sorry, but your man probably isn't an exception, nor is your male friend, your brother, your father, your son.

And by "thinking about sex with her," it usually doesn't mean thinking about romance, being married to her, taking her out on dates, gently seducing her. It's usually just going to be raw, animalistic sex, maybe with some sort of kink or fetish he has, maybe in a threesome, partner swap, or orgy.

He doesn't need to have a bond with her or even need to like her as a person. He might even hate her.

Most men aren't foolish enough to admit it to "their" woman. He might admit it if she brings it up with the right approach, but most men should pretend like they aren't like that, and you shouldn't ask if you can't handle the truth. Any man who volunteers his disagreement to this truth either isn't normal or is trying to make himself look good to you, or is protecting your feelings or your naive view of men.

Most men can't be upfront and honest about this because there's a good chance the woman they're seeing will dismiss his honest truth telling as a sick thought from a lone pervert, and use it against him. But again, he's not alone. This is the reality of how most men are. Now that you know the truth, you can understand more why things are the way they are.

It is very important to remember that most men do not ACT on these feelings by making passes if they are in a relationship that is supposed to be exclusive. Especially if the woman they are with is taking good care of them.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5