On Monday, December 30, Michael Medved sounded like he was baffled as to why more and more Americans are placing having (more) children on a much lower place on their list of priorities. Or, at least, he sounded upset. [This entry has been bumped up from 1/1/2020.]
He really needs to have someone who is proudly child-free on the show; someone who can articulate well why they don't see a need for themselves to have children or to encourage others to have children. I'm not talking about an abortion advocate or a population hysteric. Just someone who recognizes that the world has changed and children do not fit into their plans.
Being an observant Jew (of the more conservative - small "c" bent), Medved has no doubt been steeped in a subculture that encourages members to produce as many new congregants as they can (though perhaps not as strongly as Roman Catholicism or Mormonism). More individually, he's a grandpa. The days of struggling to actually raise children is a distant memory for him. Experiences as a non-custodial grandfather are very different than those of a parent.
Children change EVERYTHING.
If someone likes the way their life is, why would they want to disrupt it severely by becoming a parent?
Women are "liberated" now. If getting an education, especially an advanced degree, and becoming professionally successful are priorities for a woman, she's more likely to delay having children (and thus will have fewer children) or opt out of having any children at all. If both spouses are going to work full time outside the home, who has time for kids?
More and more men are seeing how fathers and husbands are treated by our culture and our family laws and courts, and they are opting to NOT have children. Getting a vasectomy was so easy for me. Granted, I had children already (we originally agreed to have more, but then were in over our heads with the kids we already had). If I had known before what I know now, I wouldn't have married. And being unmarried, for me and many thinking men, means NOT having children.
Life has changed. Fertility rates are finally catching up to that.
More people are willing to use contraception effectively. Yes, the Pill become available back in the 1960s, but it takes a while for stigmas to die out.
Very few of us have family farms and need kids to help work it. People are more geographically mobile, less tied to the land; fewer people have land that has been in the family for generations that they want to leave to another generation. Moving around a lot isn't kid-friendly, and people are no longer stuck in the same town in which they were born, where their options for sex partners were very limited and marrying was the way to stake your claim.
Schooling is expensive. Private school? College?
We expect kids to be constantly supervised. When I was a kid, as long as we did our chores and sports practices, we were expected to, and allowed to, entertain ourselves all day, playing outside and around town or at a friend's house. I might leave the house in the morning and my parents wouldn't see me again until after dark. This was typical. Now, the kids need to be with a parent, relative, babysitter, or a daycare; constantly under supervision.
Having kids invites even more govt intrusion into your private life.
Fewer people want or expect lifetime marriage.
It takes longer to get established.
People are marrying later, if at all.
We've turned children from assets to liabilities.
It really shouldn't be surprising that having children is a lower priority for more people. How many people in the past really didn't want (more) children, but just wanted to have sex?
Are You Worried About Lower Fertility Rates?
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